Thursday, August 14, 2008

Quaid-e-Azam + Silk Pajamas = Pakistan

YAY! Independence Day today!!!

So we may not be able to freely celebrate today, and we may not be truly independent from the shackles of the British (may I point to the posts I made during my exams?), and we may be facing a takeover by the Taliban and a try at terrorist eradication by the Americans but now you are to forget all that and know that today is the day that Pakistan turns 61!

Though Pakistan is kind of developmentally challenged, wouldn't you agree? I mean, shouldn't he (I know Pakistan is supposed to be a she but I like calling her a he, and it's fully possible that she's a transsexual and we're hurting her feelings) have been a lot more changed now from how he was in 1947? He's already reached the age of retirement and he's still stuck in the teenage phase!

Thinking about it, isn't Pakistan also sort of the unwanted child of a dysfunctional home? Those politician's really don't want to help the country very much, they just seem to want to just adopt the kid and then run off with his trust fund. Wow. He's a messed up little country. No wonder I love him so much!

Let's just hug Pakistan and hope for the best.
And all those burger people need to drop their Amrikan attitudes for just today, please. Please. Thank you.

And by the way, that stupid Geo ad for Independence Day is very messed up. You're not supposed to be swinging your arms around like an idiot when you're singing the National Anthem. Atleast not when you're coming on TV!


HEY did you notice that this post is also my 50th post? I don't think you can, but it totally indicates so on my blogger.com dashboard! HOW EXCELLENT!

See, Pakistan? This is how much I love you. Let's waltz!

Monday, August 11, 2008

Not as easy as ABC

Do the British think their kids are dyslexic? Is that why the kids' show is called CBeeBees, which is just BBC turned around?

Or maybe they're just not very creative.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Ain't nothing but mammals

Do you ever think that maybe the reason we have tides in the seas and oceans is because of the whales having sex? I just came up with that thought yesterday.
It could be.

While you ponder that idea, listen to this excellently relative song which I am sure you will enjoy quite a bit:
The Bad Touch - The Bloodhound Gang

It's hilarious! Believe it.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

You know how Andre 3000 goes in Hey Ya "Shake it like a Polaroid picture"?
And then in the Ying Yang Twins' Salt Shaker it's all about shaking it like one?

Well, I was wondering, how else can you shake it?
So I made a list:

* Like a spray can
* Like a ketchup bottle
* Like a wet dog
* Like an epileptic (excellent if you're feeling controversial)
* Like you're drying your nails
* Like a baby's rattle
* Like a handshake

Any contributions? All welcome. But you readers aren't very creative so I doubt it.
Maybe we can turn this into a song, though. We just need a filthy beat.

And just as an update, tomorrow will be the day when I am going to fully regret ever wanting to go back to school.

(Oh and I'm writing this without a mouse so I can't fill in the title. No amount of Tab-ing lets me use that field. What meanness.)

Friday, August 1, 2008

Help.

Last night I banged my head on the kitchen cabinet and burned my hand.
I feel I might be in some really crap sitcom. While I microwaved some water for this morning's Joshanda I looked around the house trying to find the hidden cameras. I couldn't see any.

Then I opened the microwave and found out that I'd forgotten to pour any water into my mug.