Oh, how hard he works

While there have been reported to be 21 suicide bombers in Karachi and 10 vans full of explosives driving around the whole of Pakistan at a time, President Zardari is out in America, attending UNO conferences and trying to find a place is Sarah Palin's arms.
How nice.

Animal abuse

If I see another movie featuring penguins, or lions, or squirrels, or giraffes, or zebras, or cows, or dogs, or cats, or rats, or hippos, or lemurs, or koalas, or monkeys, or pigs, or pandas, or chickens, or snakes, or sharks, or octopi, or shrimps, or seals, or mammoths, or mice, or ants, or apes, or bears, or beavers indulging in human actions/activities such as talking, dancing, singing, or- especially- driving any sort of vehicle, I will go MAD.
There are only so many animal movies a person can watch. I have reached my quota.

Also, I realised today as Coco attacked the computer's mouse that the clicking of buttons on the mouse kind of resembles poking its butt. Who was the freak who designed this thing?

Move aside, polar bears

Here's a fact for you: The temperature in a whale's stomach is around 40 degrees c.
And it's been so hot here these days that the temperatures are up to 42 degrees c. That means it's hotter than a whale's stomach over here!!!
I have a feeling that perhaps the whole city of Karachi just got swallowed by a misguided, hungry whale and we just don't know it yet.
It is possible. We are right on the coastline.

Now I have to go to school

What the heck, Zardari? You've only been President for one day now and already you're messing stuff up! IF OUR PROVINCIAL GOVERNMENT WANTS TO GIVE US A HOLIDAY IN CELEBRATION OF YOUR BECOMING PRESIDENT WHY DO YOU HAVE TO INTERFERE, HUH? Why can't you just let us be happy that you're here now to end what is left of Pakistan? WHY?
God, give a man some power and he goes nuts.

QUICK!

Alarm clocks are pagans. I have decided this on the basis that because of them I have missed one roza and nearly missed a second one as well. I didn't miss the second one because my mother woke up at the time of sehri and realised that she could not hear the sound of her household preparing for the day's fifteen-hour fast. So she woke us up.
I've been reading The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time and I think Christopher would make an excellent Muslim. I mean imagine how easy it would be for him to keep a fast! He never lies to begin with and he can go for days without food just because he saw four yellow cars drive past in a row! Wow, he'd be a better Muslim than me.

Oh and today Asif Zardari became our President. I know for a fact that he can not keep rozas. This is because he is a politician. A Pakistani politician. And as of today, as previously mentioned, not just any Pakistani politician but also the PRESIDENT of Pakistan. So he obviously lies far too much to be able to keep fast.
He is also mentally unfit and mentally unfit people can not fast, either. This comes from a news item I saw on TV a couple of weeks back. Apparently some British newspaper has accused Zardari of being insane in the most medical meaning of the word. They based this diagnosis on a fact, among many, that Zardair has memory problems and can not remember his children's birthdays, even. Seriously.
But I do not think Zardari was upset when he found out about this. I mean, it must have been rad for him to hear that people now think that he has memory problems!

"What's that Nawaz Sharif? I promised restoration of the judges in this week? Hm, well I just can't seem to remember ever saying that..."